making progress

Sorry for any typos, I don't have internet so I am doing this on my phone.


So Joe found my scale while we were moving. I was not hiding it, I told him when I moved in with him that I had it but it got shoved in the closet and he forgot about it. Anyways, he told me he would rather not have it in the apartment because of our eds. Without thinking I just told him to toss it since I was grumpy and in no mood to argue. I had plans to retrieve it anyway.

Last night I broke down and told him that I had hid purging and that I was finding it hard to keep hiding my struggles. He told me he has been feeling the same but was afraid of not being strong enough by telling me.
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So this morning I tossed the scale in the dumpster outside...that is progress right? I am afraid I am going to go nuts not being able to know what I weigh and fall harder into my ed.

You don't need a scale. Your weight is just a number. That's not what's really driving your ED anyway. It's just an excuse (sorry can't think of a better word). Like if you're feeling something, it's because you're feeling it and you're feeling it because of something that has happened. You are not feeling it because of your weight. If you weighed 200lbs or 100lbs, the feeling would be the same and your weight would still get the blame. Concentrate on other goals instead of weight. Make your goal about happiness or achieving things for you